The NBA's trade deadline was at 3 PM today. This is the moment when teams can go from doormats to contenders within 10 minutes. General manager of the Orlando Magic and slickster extraordinaire Otis Smith managed to pull something out of his ass literally at the last minute, because I sure as hell did not see this one coming. In a three-way deal, the Magicians have jettisoned Brian Cook, a 1st round draft pick plus a few additional benchwarmers in exchange of Rafer "Skip To My Lou" Alston from the Houston Rockets.
I'd first and foremost like to thank Chris Paul. If he didn't thoroughly dismantle the duo of corpses that currently make up the point guard rotation on the Magic in last night's loss to the Hornets, Otis would have sat on his ass and issued the standard "I like this team the way it is" press release.
Second, I'd like to thank the Rockets management for accepting the bathtub-esque Brian Cook onto their payroll. I trust they will be constructing a Sizzler restaurant adjacent to the locker room to quell his monstrous appetite. I'll personally miss his threes jacked up 45-feet away from the basket with 20 seconds left on the shot clock.
The talk on the 'net is that the Magic are back on track after this move. Even the schmucks on TNT have said the team is back in contention to win the Eastern Conference. Alston's a scrappy defender and is primarily a pass-first point guard as well as a streaky shooter. He averages a cool 11 points/5 assists a game; magnitudes better than the Johnson/Lue disaster currently in use by Orlando. He's also the true backup point guard for Orlando. Come next season it'll be a Nelson/Alston rotation, pretty swank. Alston was instrumental in the Rockets' 22-win streak last season after the cheaply constructed Yao Ming broke down with another injury. Fun times lie ahead.
Also check out his ill dribbling moves:
RAFER
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